Thursday, April 28, 2016

I Miss English!

I miss English!! I'm currently in New Zealand doing a 9 day tour of north and south islands with my whole family. The tour is Chinese tour. And yep I miss English so much.

Everyone in the tour speaks Mandarin, Shanghainese and Cantonese. Only the youngsters can speak English. Even the tour guide sucks in English. I mean suck, really suck. He speaks really little English.

So, I constantly have to think during the tour. Listening to people takes effort, talking requires even more effort. Hotel staffs are my favorite people to speak to as it's a breeze and requires 0 effort. I never realized how good I am with English now. Of course I'm not 100% fluent, I don't think I will ever be, but the effort I need to put in to communicate in English is almost nothing now.

My dad said, if it's like this everyday, my Mandarin would improve a lot. Yeah definitely. This tour guide speaks on the coach non-stop just like a broken radio and he repeats things every day and more than once a day too! Let say he talks about something on the first day which I don't even bother to listen, and then I notice it without understanding 100%, and then completely understand what he says about it, and then I'm now complaining to my dad because this tour guide keeps saying the same thing over and over!

So yeah. We'll see what happens at the end of the tour. We'll leave him tomorrow, but there would be other guide for the south island. Hope he can speak decent English! *fingers crossed*

PS: apparently that tour guide has been in NZ for 17 years!! Why???!!! @___@

Monday, April 25, 2016

How 2016 is So Unpredictable, So Far.

What 2016 has so far taught me is how quick things could happen. 1 minute everything is fine, next minute my colleague has just resigned. 1 minute life is good, the next minute that damn email telling us to sign that contract arrives in our mailbox and causing headaches to all of us. One night I didn't have job application sent, the next day I've got an interview scheduled. You really never know what could happen.

The other day I booked my tickets for the next holiday. The dates overlap with tap water's holiday, but I have lodged this holiday from long ago so I shouldn't be the one to freak out. But I did. I was so worried of what ifs and I thought I would just push the dates a week earlier just to save me headache and nervous breakdowns.

He was surprised. He said I didn't have to, but it would be great if I could. So he doesn't have to leave his job. Remember this point. So he doesn't have to leave his job to have holiday. I have paid, but the tickets haven't been issued, so I told the agent to hold the booking, called everyone who's going and asked if the could change and then contacted the travel agent. Took me 2 hours at work to sort all this out. And you know what, even my mobile phone credit ran out in the middle of a phone call dammittt! I had to call up again and repeat everything again. Finally it's sorted out.

But then after that, little missy said to me, "Ni wan dan le!". Turned out that he and his wife wanted to go to Europe in that month too! By me changing my dates, the dates became overlap with his dates! Oh God, so much drama. His wife insisted on going on the planned dates because she wanted to have her birthday overseas! Little missy was so pissed off and went on seek looking for jobs -_- I did tell you before, our IT dept has become so small that it is impossible for 2 people to take leave at the same time.

I tried to fix an issue and it caused even worse problem. That day I thought little missy was mad at me, but luckily it turned out that he was mad at his wife for being stubborn.

The next day he came happily again. They moved the dates a week early too. However he said to me, if he can't take 3 weeks off, he will find another job. He also asked me if I was thinking to find new job? He said he wants to try. I'm not sure if that's only if he can't take holiday or not.

But now, can you see the pattern? Honestly I thought the same thing too when my leave overlapped with water tap. I thought if I couldn't take it, I'd just leave my job. Water tap did too. And now little missy too. I didn't tell him about my plan at all, but he has same idea as me and water tap. Nobody is attached to this company and doesn't mind if he/she has to quit. It's so fragile, don't you think?

Anyway that night I fell asleep by 10:30. Too much stress on that day, my energy was completely drained -_- wasn't a good sleep though, waking up during the night and woke up at 5:30 in the morning.

But at least, little missy won't leave the company because of me. So hard pleasing everyone eh? Tried to make things better for me and water tap, but ended up making it hard for little missy -.- but yeah little missy hasn't even lodged the annual leave yet, how would I know??!! Water tap told me not to feel bad as it wasn't my fault, but I still felt bad. If there is medicine I can take to make me a little bit more ignorant, please let me know. I need plenty of that!

Not my fault, but why do I feel bad??

Sometimes I wished I don't get to feel bad easily. People who are ignorant are really blessed.

I've booked our tickets for our next holiday. But after I booked it, I remember that my friend did say to let her know if we're going, so I told her. Once I told her, she said she wants to go, but apparently she might not be able to take leave on the dates we've already decided. Now, I feel bad because I can't change the dates.

Last week was the same too. Water tap booked his holiday without checking if someone else already booked annual leave, and it clashes with me! He asked if I could change the date, which I can't, as my sisters can only go on those days. He said no worries, he should have checked anyway, but I still felt really bad.

Back to the friend who wants to join us for holiday. She can join the Hong Kong part, which is 5 days in total flying in and out. Only around 3.5 days full time free though. I also feel sorry coz I feel it's not enough time for her for holiday. I've suggested that she stays longer or come ahead of us so she has more time to enjoy, but she doesn't want to be alone :l

This all reminds me of what I said to Robin Hood last week. She felt bad that her desk was moved, her manager apologized to her (Mr Prick had treated her like slave for the whole project and thought that she's his. He complained she's slow while giving her all the work with no clear briefing whatsoever. He doesn't want her to do any other work except his work, eventhough he knows she has other work to do. Such a dickhead) and huge meeting was held after she complained about 1 of our projects that's super overbudget. She said, she felt sorry coz they did all those for her. To which I replied, why do you feel sorry that he had treated you so badly??? It's clearly not her fault that he was being super bossy and all, but she felt bad when he apologized.

And now I'm kinda the same. How can I be more ignorant? :/

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Tired tired tired...

Did I tell you I've been feeling so tired these days? By the time I walk out of the office, my brain feels like it's been fried crispy. Or like it's been squeezed dry. My work has always been very busy. Since my very first day, it was busy. That's why I've been wondering why the last few weeks have left me feeling so drained. I should be used to it right?

But I should have known anyway. Our IT department is the smallest that's ever be since I joined. 5 full time developers that include the manager, and 1 contractor that works once a week less than 8 hours. To make it worse, we have a lot of developments going on, bugs to fix, and the manager is on holiday. Leaving only 4 full time developers and 1 contractor (7 hours only per week).

I said to little missy yesterday, I feel very tired everyday, my brain is very tired. He replied, "everytime I go home, I only want to sleep". That's the same with me. I still hold the urge to sleep, but by Friday night, I can fall asleep as early as 9:30. Not because I want to, but because I can't stay awake. I asked him, "are we very busy? Why am I so tired??". To tell you the truth, busy is normal for our company. You can notice when it's not busy, but busy is our office nature. You can feel guilty when you have nothing to do for half hour. He then said, "of course we are busy, so many projects and we are 4 people doing 5 people work". I think he actually meant 6 people work. Because even when that manager is here, we're still very busy.

True that. I just never thought about it. It doesn't make it easier too that the other department is full of newbies that can't make our work lighter. Incomplete or incorrect information being supplied, errors that are not really errors... Those cause us to waste so much time coding and investigating just for nothing. Plus I have personal stuffs to think about too.

Everyday after work I furiously play piano tiles 2 on my mobile on the train just to untangle and relax my brain. Weird you might think, but it does relax my strained brain. Criminal minds relaxes my brain quicker though. Unfortunately it's only on once a week :( but yesterday, I really didn't want to concentrate and think to relax, so I went to a book store, went to children section and just read Noddy and His Car.

Damn... Why retirement is still 30++ years away???

Interview Stress and Office Drama is Not Good For My Health

I went to an interview yesterday. My first interview in over 8 years. And you know what? If I had more interviews aligned, by the end of it I would be as skinny as my sister.

Since it was arranged last Friday I lost my appetite to eat. Completely lost it. That day I only had half sausage roll for lunch, small piece of meat with salad for dinner. Sat lunch half eaten rad naa, dinner very little of my mum's cooking. Sunday lunch cereals. Not even a full bowl. Dinner rice with bakut teh, mostly just the broth. Monday lunch 2 small fruit buns. Dinner little rice with omelette and veggie. Tue lunch tea and 1 biscuit -_- I really need to weigh myself. I can feel my pants loose around the waist. I'm actually hungry, but just no appetite.

I haven't even told you about my sleep. I wake up as early as 5:30 since Saturday! Even when I slept at 12:30-1AM. Once I open my eyes, I start worrying again. It's really not a good thing for my health.

About the interview, I pray pray and pray that they don't call me back for second round. I don't think I did well anyway. Plus it's really opposite of what I want. It is not bad, but just not what I wished it would be. And I'm worried I would take it just to escape my current company and regret it afterwards.

Another thing that I worry about is the contract. Last Friday DaShaBi signed it, Monday brush head signed it. Yesterday, Lao-Er asked red head and little missy to sign it. They both managed to delay it, but they don't know how they can get away. I don't know either. We really need help from fairwork. If only someone can tip them off :(

Ah and finally Robin Hood talked to superexcited yesterday. Telling him about how prick has been treating and micromanaging her all these time. About time, I said. As the result, she's moving desk further from him today and would be off that big annoying project by the end of next month. Prick was called into meeting to explain why that big annoying project is 5 times over the budget. His excuse is the cost was done before the requirements document was made. Water Tap and I were like, well... You should have worked around the budget. It's like you pay $1000 for a party, but don't know how many are coming. When you finally know how many are coming, then you decide on appropriate food. If 50 people come, then they get $20 of food each. But if 100 come, well tough luck, you get cheaper one. Isn't it?

The problem with prick is, he over over OVERcomplicates things. The brief could be just a page with list of things to do. He will turn it into an online checklist where you can check off when you finish it. It's a great idea ofcourse, but not when the client doesn't pay for it???

Later that day, Prick went to Robin Hood and apologize. She said she almost felt sorry for him as he was teary eyed. That's the good thing about Prick. He can easily apologize to people. But yeah about changing? Don't wish so much. This is at least the third time someone who works with him has requested to be moved away from him.

Anyway wish me a good and peaceful day please. I really really need it. And please please please don't ask me about that interview, at least for the next 6 months, since it's giving me headache -_-

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Candy Candy's Resignation - Who Misses Superexcited??

To those of you who missed superexcited, I've got a new story for you.

Yesterday, my colleague, Candy Candy, told me that he had resigned. I noticed he hasn't been happy at work, and his creativity has been restricted a lot by superexcited who again and again changes his designs. Well, the end result is not THAT bad, but I can see traces of superexcited in there. The worst would be our Christmas party invitation last year. It was so bad that I was speechless when Candy Candy showed me the invitation. I could only say "Oh!" And then didn't know what to say. Then I asked, "Did superexcited tell you to put those opera house and fireworks?". He said, "He changed everything! My original design wasn't anything like this". I said to him, "Sorry, Candy Candy, but I can make this myself. Just cut opera house and fireworks and dump them there." He said, "Yeah, I know! I showed this to my girlfriend, and she said, you didn't design this, did you??".

He's a very nice guy and I don't know why, he sometimes calls me over and asks my opinion of his designs (FYI, I'm not a designer at all. I think I mentioned it before, but my old boss once told me I have no eyes for colors and should get someone else to choose colors for me). I do give honest opinion and have developed a reputation of being a blunt and hard critic in the office. Part of this is really because I don't care anymore if I get sacked. So I just say whatever I want. But really, I don't say bad things anyway, just honest.

Anyway back to him, I remember seeing his design etc and said it was good or gave suggestions, but when I saw the end result, it was different. When I asked him, he said superexcited changed it -_- last week was one of them. He created a card for water tap anniversary on a white background. The card ended up on a dark background. Water tap's skin is dark, so dark background makes him invisible *slapping my forehead and shaking my head* Obviously someone else has worse eyes for colors than me. Plus the original background shows a coding screen, while the end result eventhough still showing coding screen, on dark background it looks more like stockbroker screen -_-

Candy Candy said he gave his resignation last week and it was rejected by superexcited (as always). They had 1 hour discussion in superexcited's room where he said that Candy Candy was being disrespectful and unprofessional for resigning after working for only less than a year AND for not telling them first before finding a new job. He said during his interview, he already said that he expects people to work at least 3 years. Now he has to train new person etc. The thing with superexcited, he has that skill to manipulate you and to make you doubt yourself. Girls cried during these kind of meetings and he doesn't shut up even when they cry. Candy Candy said he broke down yesterday too (outside, not in front of superexcited thank god) because it was too much stress! So yeah imagine that.

Then this Friday is our company get together event, Candy Candy doesn't know if he should come. He feels that superexcited wouldn't want him to be there. Honestly I think he's right. It would be awkward. So he asked Lao Er if he should come. Lao Er said he'll check with superexcited. Lao Er is also a director, but see his reply? He doesn't have power at all! As much as I love Lao Er, I wished he can stand up more for himself :( honestly, if superexcited says he's not allowed to come, we can really report him to fairwork Australia for discrimination and bullying. If he allows Candy Candy to come, there are 2 options: either superexcited is going to completely ignore him or he's going to give him dead stare etc. Actually, I was surprised Candy Candy wasn't ushered out of the building straight away after he resigned :l

I don't know what is going to happen when it's my turn *sigh...